We finalized my mother's funeral arrangements yesterday covered by her funeral trust. My sister suggested having a dinner with family and some close friends after mother's funeral.
My mother has a bank account that my sisters and I are signatories on. We have not notified the bank yet that she is deceased. My sister says we should pay for this dinner in cash out of our mother's account.
My mother was also on Medicaid. There cash balance is within the amount Medicaid allows to cover house expenses under the right to turn rules. Would Medicaid have a problem with taking probably what would be $1,000 out of her account to pay for a funeral dinner? We are going to have to pay Medicaid something since we were within the 5 year look back when my mother applied for Medicaid. A large part of the house sale will go to satisfying this.
My other sister is the executor of the estate, I know she will ultimately have to decide. I don't want something foolish like this to come back to haunt us.
I really wanted to split the bill three ways, my sister has plenty of money and it shouldn't be a problem for her to pay her third. I am inclined just not doing anything quite frankly.
If there is a way you can get this out get it out NOW.
There isn't a way this can come back to bite you and if it does no one will bother for this amount I do believe. And if so, simply plead ignorance. The banker won't let it out if he can't. He either has to seal this account for the executor and her new EIN or he doesn't.
Executorship does not come into play until the Will is probated. That takes 9 or 10 days from death. The Executor will get a short certificate to handle Moms finances. Medicaid will do a recovery. I was able to get the amount owed from Moms caseworker. This gave me an idea of what I needed to get for Moms house. The lien was placed on the house. The house has to be sold at Market Value. If Medicaid lien goes beyond that they get the proceeds. If under, then the beneficiaries will get something. Or gives you a little wiggle room to negotiate price. Tax liens get satisfied before Medicaid.
Your last sentence struck me though .
“ I am inclined just not doing anything …”
If your father is not going to be at the dinner, don’t feel obligated to go .
I am totally not the party after funeral type person in general . I went after my Dad’s funeral because I was my mother’s ride to the “ after party “ and because my mother expected all her children to attend, and to be supportive of Mom .
I did not meet up with other family after my mother’s funeral , I went home .
A long caregiving slog was over and I had to deal with the emotions in my own way .
If anything I would probably visit your Dad in the nursing home instead after the funeral if he could not leave the facility to attend .
He certainly won't be attending the dinner. That would be too much.