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Because she grew up in a generation where women were taught men were the head of the family and to be respected, whilst the daughters are just on a par with you.
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bundleofjoy Apr 2021
dear taylor,

hug!!

i disagree.
it might even be that the mother herself tells herself she behaves like this because of history, geography, culture, economy, slavery, the ice age, literature, movies, role models, her grandmother, her little toe.

it's not because of that.

cookie25 said her mother gets mad and raises her voice at the daughters.

in other words, she's MEAN to her daughters.

it has nothing to do with history, geography, culture, economy...how the mother was treated by her mother ---- ALL IRRELEVANT.

...from monster parents, sometimes there are wonderful children.
...from wonderful parents, sometimes there are monster children.

some people simply ENJOY hurting others.

I DO NOT BELIEVE IT'S A BRAIN DISORDER.

simply:
some people enjoy being mean.
and IT'S ON PURPOSE.
that's why it's not directed at everyone. very sweet voice towards A, but mean towards B.

some mothers ARE JEALOUS OF THEIR DAUGHTERS.

some mothers aren't jealous, and only adore their daugthers.
it's been like this throughout history; any part of the Earth. nothing to do with culture.

you'll find some sweet mothers in North, South, East, West, throughout history.

bundle of joy :)
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The generation that produced Rosie the Riveter? Who had Eleanor Roosevelt as a role model? Who watched Bette Davis and Katherine Hepburn on screen - not to mention Gone With The Wind?

I've never bought this generational theory. Some families were deferential to men and some weren't and still are or aren't because there is nothing new under the sun.
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Because he is the little prince and mom raises daughters to be CARING and THOUGHTFUL. The son has more important things to do. I love my parents but the truth is - I became the fixer so as not to stay the scapegoat. There are some caring guys out there looking after parents, but usually they put themselves, and career, first because society, and parents, teach them to do it. My dad would just fuss - I said, Hey I didn't raise him!
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I am 57. My 65 year old brother lives rent free in my 96 year old mom's one bedroom independent living apartment in an senior living building. He has lived with her for about 10 years. He has always been the golden child. She moved apartments once to have him not live with her and then gave him a key. Since he is not on the lease, he was sneaking in during the first weeks of the covid lockdown. He got caught and they told him he couldn't do that anymore and he threatened a lawsuit. My mom was so concerned that he wasn't there that I actually went to bat for him and got things worked out so he could be there. I hadn't talked to him for years as he has stolen from me a few times and I don't trust him and I put up boundaries. He does nothing for her except go to the grocery store once in a while. I do everything else. She complains about him to me all the time - all his stuff is in the way, he eats all the groceries that she buys (I take her to the grocery store or bring them to her) and I don't say anything. About 1 1/2 months ago, she asked us to find her an assisted living apartment because she finally admitted she need more help. I had already put in work taking her around looking at independent apartments. I put aside my issues with my brother in order to get her moved. We started with the assisted living apartments where she lives. It was ok, not great. We asked her if she wanted to go with us to look at others and she said no, just make a decision. We found her a great place 9 blocks from where she is now. I took her to look at it and she agreed. Then all hell broke loose. After we started the process, she told both of us she is refusing to move. She tells me it was all my decision to move her and that my brother never said he was going to move out. He and I have had many, many discussions (some which I hear him talking to her when we are on the phone and he continues to tell her he is moving out). Then the other day he tells me he may be moving out of state. Well, there is nothing we can do to force our mother to move so he gave in and I have no choice. Now, he is still living with her and I'm stuck. This morning she called and tells me she is going to the hospital because she doesn't feel well (something she has done over and over - even though her regular doctors tell her she is fine). She is trying to wake up my brother who is sleeping on the couch to help her. Of course he doesn't get up. She also told me I need to go see someone to talk deal with my issues. She has had me cancel appointment after appointment for her to go talk to someone.
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LOL sounds like my mom, although she never yelled at me and was always thanking me for my assistance. But if I ever suggested we call one of my brothers to help out she always had a reason not to "bother" them. Didn’t matter that we all had full time jobs, homes, etc. the boys were not to be bothered.

My parents were both raised in families ( 6 sibs for dad, 5 for Mom) with clear divisions between girl jobs and boy jobs. Girls cleaned the house, did laundry, prepared and cleaned up meals, made the beds, made clothing and did the mending, etc. Boys emptied the trash and mowed the grass. Same thing when we were kids in the 60s-70s. My parents went to every sporting event my brothers were in, but never came to any of my sister or my music events. Brothers were rewarded when they got Cs on their report cards but sister and I, who usually made straight As, did not. Mom said "well, we EXPECTED you girls to get good grades!!!!!!

Mom told me years later that she should have made the boys do more but dad said no. I have to admit that I was much better prepared for life than my brothers who had to find wives who would do all that for them.
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Some moms just love the boys better, some moms just love the girls better, some moms love all their children but will give responsibility to those they feel will handle their assests fairly. Moms many times react in the way they do depending on their experience in life with male and female, mom or dad, sister or brother. We never know about moms. I'm still struggling with which one of my chldren do i give the responsibly to handle my affairs. All have the capability at this point they all get along :)
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