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I am new here. My mom moved in a few months ago. She is 88 and has dementia. She sleeps well at night for which I am grateful. She goes to bed around 8-8:30 and sometimes sleeps until almost noon. A few times this week, I peeked in around 10 - 11. She was in the bathroom so I figured I would start making her breakfast, but when I checked again, she had gone back to bed. Is this normal?

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Be thankful! Many dementia patients have the opposite problem: can’t sleep or sleeps only during the day while up all night. My mom’s doctor mentioned that towards the end-of-life, my mom would sleep most of the day and still sleep during the entire night. So far, that hasn’t happened. I was told to just ensure she’s comfortable and hydrated when that time comes.
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My wife often sleeps until noon. She is put to bed nightly between 9:30 p.m. and 10:00 p.m. As long as I can see her chest moving, I am happy that she sleeps.

Late morning sleeping for her means "brain rest" for me!
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Body does what it needs. Only make sure when she is awake that the quality of food, fluid and experiences are bespoke to her.
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This is OK both for you and your mother. People with dementia need more sleep and can often regulate it themselves. This is one of the great advantages of being at home, not in a care home with regulated times for sleeping, drinking and eating meals.

My wife is 14 years into Alzheimers and sleeps well from 8pm to 9:15 in the morning. She is confined to bed, but still able to relate and smile, although she is often hard to understand. Then after breakfast and watching tv she naps for a while, wakes up, has lunch and then naps again. She is sleeping some 17 to 19 hours of 24, which is a lot.

However, there are research studies that suggest sleep helps people with dementia to live better with the amyloid plaques and Tau tangles in the brain. It does not remove either the plaques or the tangles, but it seems in some way that is not understood to enable the person with dementia to live a better quality of life.

This has been true for me and my wife of 58 years for several years now. As other respondents have said, many family caregivers become exhausted because the person they are caring for is NOT sleeping and demanding that others stay up with them.

Be encouraged. You can manage this.

Take care (of yourself). Give care (to others).

Prayers in facing the daily challenges of life.
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disgustedtoo May 2021
"...not in a care home with regulated times for sleeping, drinking and eating meals."

Not all places have a regimented schedule. At the facility my mother was in, they could get up when they wanted and eat when they wanted. Certainly there were regular meal times, with food delivered at those times, but the majority were ready, willing and able to partake in those meal times, many getting settled at the tables up to 30 minutes before the food was even brought to the unit! For those who didn't want to eat at those times or slept in or napped, there was always some food that could be provided when they wanted to eat.

They would also have activities scheduled at various times of the day, and would encourage as many as possible to participate. No one was ever forced to join in or adjust their own personal "schedule" to the "norm."

I can certainly understand places that do try to keep on some kind of schedule. They have to tend to many for meals, bathing, toileting, changing, medications, etc. as well as planned activities. Without some kind of schedule, it would be total chaos.
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I only wish my mom who has dementia would sleep like that! For the last few weeks though she will only take little cat naps. Night time seems to be when she is wide awake and clomping up and down the hallway in her walker saying that she either isn't tired or she doesn't know where she is at. The bags under my eyes prove that she keeps me awake too. Feel grateful that your mom doesn't do that!
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LoveLea May 2021
Ah, yes. Have to love night meds!
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Imho, my own late mother, even though she did not have dementia, would tire out VERY easily, e.g. addressing one greeting card. She would even verbalize the fact that she "was so tired." She was 94 years old. If your mother requires sleep, so be it.
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my mom's doctor said to let her sleep as much as she wants to, so i do
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My mom lived with me the past year and only returned to her ALF 2 weeks ago (when they had their first Covid outbreak after she was there only 5 days! Ugh!) Anyway, yes, she slept til 11am or noon after going to bed about 7pm. She’d have breakfast and go back to bed after 30 minutes. I think a lot of it was boredom.
But it was her normal.
Sending you a hug. None of it is easy.
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My mother slept like that, too, and I'm convinced a large part of it was just boredom. Once I moved her to memory care, they got her up every morning at a set time, got her dressed, and after breakfast she's in the common room watching if not always participating in the activities.

Boredom is crushing, and trying to entertain a senior all day is exhausting as well. I'd try to get your mom up after a 10-hour sleep, give her breakfast, then try to have something stimulating for her to do for a while. Talk about what's in the news, work on her memoirs for a bit (prompts available online), play Scrabble or work on a puzzle, go for a walk or sit outside for a while -- have something for her to look forward to. Have a snack a couple hours before lunch, then watch a little TV or a video. Have lunch, go outside again, have a snack again, wave your arms around and do some chair exercises, then it's time to get dinner. Talk to her while you make dinner, have her set the table or peel potatoes. Watch a little TV after dinner, then it's time for bed.

It's a lot to keep her stimulated and awake, and maybe it's worth it to get someone in to help, but I'd give it a shot to see if she's really that tired or just bored.
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Emmdee May 2021
Far too busy for me!!!!!
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As long as she’s sleeping through the night I don’t think it’s a problem. Our bodies tell us when we need sleep. Let her enjoy it.
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RedVanAnnie May 2021
seem right to me, too Sleeping may be what your mother most needs to do now.
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I will be 88 and I must have ten solid hours of sleep and wake up naturally. If I do, I can handle just about anything during the day as I am very busy doing something constantly. When I worked, I got seven or eight hours sleep and had to fight constantly to stay awake and not be a complete zombie. I go to bed around l a.m. as I can't sleep before the and often wake up at 11:30 a.m. Leave us alone - sleep is healing and does not hurt anyone. And why get up? What do old people do? Not much of anything so let us sleep.
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Emmdee May 2021
Brilliant answer!

Why do people feel the need to impose their schedules on us oldies?
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My mother was a late sleeper for years - but as she's aged she's up earlier - she's 88 with only MCI. I would say -on the other hand my husband sleeps later and later and also naps during the day - but he's also up half the night and I'm usually asleep when he comes to bed.

Have mom see her doc for any underlying conditions, such as heart problems. If the doc finds nothing, then if she wishes let her sleep.
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Since she sleeps well at night, I wouldn't worry too much. Many seniors take a nap after lunch and then sleep well at night. It seems your mom prefers her "naps" in the morning. As long as she is eating well, getting plenty of fluids, and some sunshine - she seems to be fine.
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🖐..
Hope you two are making the best of your time together. I was a caregiver and in the beginning I had no idea. I started listening to Teepa Snow for professional training and advice. This helped tremendously. I had a monitor in her room so I could see and hear my Auntie. Hopefully she's eating well and has a positive attitude 🙂. She's fine relaxing (sleeping)😌. That's what my Auntie called it. Take care of yourself get support and remember to take lots if viedo of you guys having fun together because you'll going to miss her when she's gone. Love in Christ.💙
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I wish my Mom had napped. She did when she was home not when she lived with me. Iff she did, it was 40 winks thing. She would get up around 3am thinking it was time to get up. By the time I got her back in bed, I was wide awake. Shevdid go to bed by nine and get up about 8am. I let her sleep if she went passed 8. She would be disoriented if I woke her up.
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My mother is 92 with dementia. I recently placed her in assisted living because after 4-5 years of her living with my husband and me, I could no longer be therapeutic with her. Anyway, she has always liked to sleep in late, and she continued to do so even as her bedtime became earlier (10 p.m.). I gave up on trying to get her going in the morning and allowed her to sleep in until 1 or 2 p.m. She could easily sleep in until 4 p.m. and still go to bed at 10. Her doctors, including her neurologist have expressed it is not a worry, so I don’t worry. At the Assisted Living facility, they bring her breakfast late morning and she may go back to sleep until 2-3 p.m. She misses out on activities, but she is adamant about sleeping late. She is taking an antidepressant and does not show other signs of depression. I think it is her way of coping with a life for which she feels little enthusiasm.
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As long as she is sleeping at night, I suppose it would be ok to sleep during the day. Dementia must be a nightmare, and sleeping might just be an escape. My Mom slept alot too.
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If you chose to sleep in,, would you want someone waking you up?

People with dementia do sleep alot and when you're older you sleep more anyway.

I would let her sleep in as long as it doesn't effect her sleeping at night.

You might ask her if she would like you to wake her up in the mornings or let her wake up when she wants.

Do you have something for her to do or is she waking up sooner to have more time during the day to stare at the walls?
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People do tend to sleep more and more in the latter years of their life but I am of the opinion that it is better if possible to get up in the morning and then lie down again for a nap if needed.
-it allows for toileting or incontinence changes
-it is better for skin integrity to get out of bed and move,
-it allows them to eat and drink something which can help stave off dehydration, digestive issues and the frailty that can be the result of too few calories
-it keeps medication schedules consistent
-it may help with bedtime and overnight sleeplessness
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KKTheBean May 2021
Good morning. :0) I was so glad you replied add you did, regarding the question on elderly sleeping in. They were mainly things that hadn't occurred to me. Excellent points!! Thank you.
:0)
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Increased sleeping is normal in the decline with dementia.
My Husband would go to bed around 7 and would stay in bed until I got him up at 7AM. He was usually awake but if not I would turn the light on about 6:45 or so and that would more gently wake him than me telling him it was time to get up. This worked out great when he went on Hospice and the CNA would come about 7 so he was used to getting up then.
I would shower him, dress him and get breakfast and he would doze on and off until lunch, eat lunch then doze on and off until dinner.
the amount of time sleeping increased so that towards the last month of his life he was sleeping about 20 hours if not a bit more each day.
I would try to keep him as active as I could either a walk or a ride to one of his favorite places (Sam's or Costco for the free samples) until it became unsafe for me to get him into the car or take him for a walk.
Keeping her active might help.
Getting a set routine will also help. Helps greatly when you actually have an appointment and need to get going at a specific time.
If she is used to going to bed at 8 or 8:30 getting her up and ready for the day at 7:00- 7:30 (or whatever time works best for you). that would give her enough sleep and if she is tired she can cat nap later. But trying to keep her engaged, active is a good idea.
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Other than if her diaper needs to be changed(you say in your profile she's incontinent) so she won't get any sores, I would let her sleep. It's kind of like you never want to wake a sleeping baby. You can probably get a whole lot more done with her sleeping, so enjoy it while it lasts, because with dementia things can change on a dime. Wishing you the best, and please make sure that you're taking care of yourself, and taking time for yourself as well.
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PollyN May 2021
I didn’t say that in my profile so I am not sure if it may have been confused with someone else. She does most of her own toileting but does wear disposable underwear.
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Definitely should be grateful that she sleeps well at night. lol. It does seem like a lot of sleep but not unheard of as dementia progresses.

I'm sure there are lots of things to adjust to with her being rather new at your house. Make sure to get time for yourself.
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